Night of 1,000 Backslaps
I feel compelled to write something about last night's Oscars (a.k.a the George Clooney Show), but how am I to compete with the likes of podcasts and Live! Oscar blogs and Salon's Cintra Wilson? This event has already been journalisized to death (and I'm embarrassed to admit that I've read most of it. As if six+ hours of telecast wasn't enough.) For the record, I'll say that Jon Stewart did a fine job and I'm perplexed by the negative backlash. What more could people have expected from the poor dude? This ain't the MTV Movie Awards; he couldn't very well let down his Jew-y hair completely.
Some of the night's biggest mysteries remain to be solved: Why did Tom Hanks come onstage all furrowed and cursing like a sailor? What exactly was going on behind the singer of the Crash theme song? Whatever that elemental slow-mo shit was, it was worse than the infamous Oscars 98 Debbie Allen choreotragedy. Was Reese really wearing one of Diaper-Faced Dunst's sloppy seconds from 2003? And if so, why didn't her stylist freakin' know that? What do stylists do all day if not update their sartorial spreadsheets?
Now that it's over, we can sit back and enjoy the flood of nominees releasing on DVD. Update your queues, people.
UPDATE: A source at Defamer claims that the "Forrest Gump Theme" is behind Tommy's tirade. Touche.
posted by Sandy @ 3:38 PM
3 comments
3 Comments:
Is Tom afraid of being typecast as Forest Gump? He certainly didn't run onto stage. As for fashion, who cares unless a boob plops out periodically? I oddly missed not having a gay designer wontonly manhandle today's young starlets. Still somehow, it seemed more about the announcers than the stars. And let us not forget the infamous cutoffs with the music and dimming of the lights?! Oscars are tired out I fear.
I was surprised by the Jon Stewart backlash - he was about as brilliant as you can get in that context. Let's face it, people are backlashing against anything they can get their hands on. I even read a backlash against Jennifer Garner's tits lacking sufficient support! And this complaint came from a guy (supposedly). People are just in a whiny mood. The most prevalent complaint at my Oscar party: Why didn't any of the men bother to shave? Everyone had odd tufts and puffs of hair in random places on their faces, they looked dopey. Probaby the only man who could pull off an unshaven face and still look hot is Clooney... but he DID shave. Two of the worst offenders: Paul Giamatti and Jake Gyllenhaal.
Maybe we're the only people in the world who thought Jon did a good job. He did seem a little nervous in the monologue, but that was probably due to the fact that the old folks in the Academy clearly didn't get his jokes. All of the segments that he did (the campaigns for Best Actress, Gay Western montage, etc) were far more entertaining than anything put together by the producers. And he ad-libbed like a champ. Especially after the "social issues" montage when he said, "And after that, none of these things were ever a problem again."
Reese's dress was a 1955 Christian Dior - it was her ill-fitting Globes "vintage" that was only like three years old and a castoff of La Dunst. HA!
Post a Comment
<< Home